Why my Wife calls me “Bambi”.

Me and ice do not mix well.

Every winter when the pavements are glaced in the shiny transparent death I always end up sliding over and badly bruising myself. I have no grip or balance whatsoever.

Ice skating is a big no no. The first (and last) time I did it I more or less was slipping over with every attempted step I took. I was dating my future wife at this point who could see the sheer terror on my face so she hooked my arm and helped me around the ring, bless her. My pride was not even hurt as it was the only way I’d have been able to skate fully.

Snowboarding was also an experience! First (and again, last) attempt of it, we had to travel to the top of this huge slope. I mean, I’m not a massive fan of heights, but to be expected to slide down backward with your feet strapped into this skateboard without the wheels is terrifying. The amount of times I fell on my back…I was covered in bruises by the end of it and decided winter activities maybe aren’t for me.

My wife calls me Bambi for the simple reason I’m like Bambi was when I’m on ice; I’m unsure and scared about what’s happening and most the time end up injuring myself.

I think I’ll just stick to ice in my drinks thanks.

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