I never claim to be a great cook. I mean I can cook but it’s something that I hate doing and it bores me to tears. When I lived on my own I always used to be a plain eater; plain pasta, plain meats, a lot of beige food and the saddest meal of my life was a singular Microwaved Pork Chop on a little dish. It sat there all sad and alone but it satisfied my stomach for the time being.
Fast forward a few more years and I said my partner “Go sit down, I’ll make dinner tonight”. Like I was genuinely in the mood to cook which is a rare thing for me. I was feeling very experimental, so I had an amazing Omelette idea lined up. As far as I was concerned it was to be the best damn Omelette anyone has ever tasted. I filled it to the brim with veggies and herbs/spices; Gordon Ramsey move aside…but then I took it that little bit too far. I got way too over excited.
Staring over to the fruit bowl I thought it would be a great idea to add freshly sliced Banana into the Omelette in the attempt to make it “tropical”.
“This will surprise Hannah, she’ll absolutely love it” I thought.
Time to dish up.
I proudly placed each half on our plates and passed the dish to Hannah. I couldn’t wait to taste it. I rubbed my hands together and watched as Hannah took her first two bites.
Her face dropped. “Have you put a Banana in this!?” She asked.
“Erm, yes?” I responded. Judging by her face it wasn’t a positive question so I took my own bite. It was absolutely disgusting. The vilest thing I’ve ever tasted.
I went in such a grump that I picked my plate up and threw the food in the bin and spat at it, then booted the bin with my foot. Hannah shouted from the dining area “It’s not too bad” but she was just trying to be nice. Never again will I put Banana in anything. I was in such a mood for the rest of that afternoon, I think I just had a Pot Noodle in the end.
Even a dog would turn its nose up at my utter disgusting creation. Since then I’ve never been experimental and just followed a Cook Book.